It’s a quiet morning and I’m enjoying the peace and shuffling through my cards. I want to pull one for you and share the wisdom I find there. This week’s Wisdom Card has this message for you. “I love and accept myself right now.” and “I am in the process of becoming my own best friend — the person I am most joyous to be with.”
I’m living this and breathing this right now. I sincerely like who I am. If I ran into myself out in the world I would think I’m super cool and pretty interesting. I have lived alone in my cozy little apartment for seven years now. Some people are shocked to hear this. They just don’t get how living alone could be anything but lonely and boring.
Living alone used to be a nightmare.
In the beginning, I hated it. The silence was oppressive, I hated coming home to the emptiness day after day after day. I filled my days with playing online video games (World of Warcraft addict here!) because it allowed me to not be “present”. I didn’t have to acknowledge that I was utterly and completely alone. What I really wanted was a partner, someone to share that silence with so badly, and it led me to fall for the wrong person just to try to fill it.
I sank into a depression.
Today it is a completely different story. I LOVE my company. If you haven’t noticed, I am a pretty awesome chick, quite entertaining, and my heart is pretty gigantic; what’s not to love? I have learned to entertain myself, to take care of and love myself. You can learn that too. Like any relationship, it takes work, communication, and a whole lot of love, but it’s worth it.
When I’m in a bad mood I usually have an internal dialogue with myself and it goes something like this:
“Okay Dominee. What do you need sweetie? I’m going to get you a nice cup of tea okay? And how about comfy pajamas? And you know that song you like to dance around to wearing nothing but your underwear? Let’s try listening to that.”
I guarantee you I will not want to move from my spot on my couch. I will not want to listen to music and I will not want to even attempt to feel better, but Best-Friend-Dominee doesn’t care, she gets up and she takes care of me, because that’s what best friends do.
I’ve learned how to be my own best friend.
And when I’m anxious and feeling overwhelmed? I tell myself how good I’m doing.
So spend some time today working on your relationship with you. Do something fun with yourself and know that you don’t need another person to “share” fun with to make it valid and meaningful. Dance around your house, do something super nice for you just because, look in the mirror and know that you’re a pretty awesome, amazing, fantastic, you!
What’s your friendship status with yourself?
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Excellent blog post, girl, and your site looks fantastic!
You are most definitely an awesome chick!
Sharon is right, your blog is growing beautifully.
love your posts!!! and looking forward to every new one!
Wonderful post Dominee and I love your new look on your blog ;)
Lovely! I need a best friend Faeriedaughter!!
I remember living alone, and I loved it so much. I was never lonely – I loved being in my own company, following what I wanted to do and being totally independant. LOVED it. Miss it sometimes now that I live with people, and I LOVE it when my partner goes away for the weekend :D.
This is EXACTLY what I needed today thank you!!
Beautiful post, Dominee! I'm really lucky that I very much enjoy my own company (sometimes to the point that I feel as though I'm being antisocial, but I start going a bit crazy if I don't get enough me time… so if that's the case, so be it!)
That internal dialogue you have with yourself is something I need to learn to do. Thank you for sharing it!
It's been a long, hard road, but this year I feel I've really come into that friendship territory with my Self. I loved living alone for the brief time I did, so being by myself has never been the issue. It's always been that I have trouble being a friend to myself when others are involved. But I'm learning the value of self-ishness and finding that our friendship is growing every day.
Great reminder. I've been really trying to allow myself to be there for me like it wants to be. I know I want to be there for myself but I've been meeting it with resistance. Over the past few weeks however I have been opening up and allow the love to flow in slowly. It feels nice. A lot nicer than resisting. :]