I’ve always been a huge fan of self-love quotes. There are some that have had a powerful effect on me and changed the way I view an important part of my life. “You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep people warm.” had a profound effect on me. It changed my way of thinking on a lot of levels.
I was thinking that if I could condense my views on self-love and self-care into 5 quotes, what would they be? So here ya go! These are my own words and my own wisdom on self-love. I’d love to hear your self-love soundbites in the comments!
“Self Love does not require you to ignore your faults, but rather to refuse to use them as an excuse to dislike yourself.”
I’m not perfect, you’re not perfect and that’s perfectly okay. I wish I had a better handle on my temper sometimes, I’d like to lose a few pounds, I really wish my big toes weren’t hairy and sometimes I get a tiny bit self-conscious over the stretch marks on my belly and the fact that I have a lady ‘stache. I do not use any of these things to berate myself or to excuse abusive thoughts and words aimed at myself.
Nobody (or body) is flawless but it’s important to love yourself anyway.
“Self-care is different for everyone. You don’t have to be a vegan eating, yoga doing, meditation practicing, Buddhist. Self-care is simply making time for yourself to do the things that make your soul shine. Whatever those things are.”
If listening to hip-hop while you dance around your bedroom in lingerie is something that makes your soul happy and you’re making the time to do it, that is self-care. If you get a babysitter and go out drinking with your girlfriends, something that you rarely get to do, that is also self-care. It doesn’t have to look like what you see in the magazines or blogs. It doesn’t have to fit any sort of lifestyle. As long as it’s truly nourishing and good for your soul. Do what makes you happy.
“The decision to love yourself for who you are is a gift that you are giving to everyone around you.”
You can’t see how self-love changes your relationships until you start practicing it. You’ll be an example to your kids in happiness, in self-esteem, in valuing themselves and in body positivity because they will see those things put into practice with you. Without the insecurities and low self-esteem that come with not loving yourself, your romantic relationships will grow stronger or you’ll choose people who truly value you and give you what you need. Self-love forces you to create boundaries with toxic friends and family members and cutting out that kind of drama nourishes so many aspects of your life.
“Your soul will never be fully nourished by anyone’s love but your own.”
It’s fine to seek validation, love, and acceptance from other people. It really is, it’s natural and human and it’s something you need. Do you need to love yourself before others will love you? It depends. There are some wonderful, patient, compassionate souls that will love you regardless of how you feel about yourself, regardless of whether or not you love yourself. Where the disconnect happens is when you desperately seek someone else to fill you up because you aren’t paying attention to those things inside of you.
When you don’t love yourself your relationships are often strife with jealousy issues, lack of trust, and a deep feeling of not-being-good-enough. That can put a lot of strain on your partner. So no, it’s not true that no one will love you until you love yourself. But it makes things so much easier!
Seek to love, validate, and approve of yourself and you’ll find that what others give you is not all that you need and that you’ll also be able to more easily accept those things.
“Who you were yesterday doesn’t matter as much as who you are right now.”
Every single day you are given the option to continue on as you were or to change your life. Really change your life. Don’t get me wrong. It’s difficult, it’s terrifying, you might fail 100 times before you actually manage to get the change to stick. The point is trying. The point is never giving up. Each one of those experiences makes you stronger than you were before and as long as you keep on moving, even if you don’t get it right right now, that’s the really important part.
Never give up.
These are all great, but I especially love the second one. You’re absolutely right that self-love/care doesn’t have to fit some kind of template or lifestyle. Be yourself. Do your thang.
Good and powerful. Thanks