Hey there lovely!
How’s it going? I mean how is it REALLY going?
One thing that I learned about myself long ago, is that when someone asks me that question, “How’s it going?” or “How are you?” I have automatic answers. “Good. Great. Okay.” I hardly ever deviate from one of those three. Sometimes that’s honest and other times it’s the farthest thing from the truth. Feelings are personal, intimate even, so when someone asks you how you are, especially someone who is just trying to be polite and friendly, it’s difficult to acknowledge how we feel. It’s difficult to say out loud that we aren’t okay. And you know what? That’s okay. You don’t have to spill your guts to every polite and friendly person that you come across. However, there is something that you have to do:
You have to be honest with yourself.
Sometimes you’re just in a crappy mood, and you are allowed to be in a crappy mood. You are allowed to be sad or angry or moody. You don’t have to pretend that your feelings don’t exist. You can “fake it until you make it” with the world, but for yourself… for yourself… acknowledge what you feel and why you feel it.
Don’t push your feelings down just because everyone expects you to be happy. When you have an unpleasant feeling don’t pretend that it doesn’t exist just because you want to be the kind of person that doesn’t feel it. I hate feeling jealousy for example, and for a very long time I told myself that I wasn’t going to be jealous. I was going to be happy for other people, I was going to be accepting and loving if it killed me. Whenever I felt jealous it was the equivalent of squeezing my eyes shut, putting my fingers in my ears and saying “I’m not jealous. I’m not jealous. I’m not jealous.”
What I learned is that if you don’t acknowledge it, it simmers under the surface and then it comes back with a vengeance. Acknowledge what you feel, be honest with what is going on inside of you without the views and expectations of others (and even sometimes yourself) weighing you down.
Your self love assignment for the day:
Take a few minutes of quiet time and really check in with yourself and how you are feeling. Are there any feelings that you’ve brushed aside but you can still feel them lingering in the back of your mind? Is there something that you need help with but you’re afraid to ask for it because everyone sees you as so capable and put together? Let go of what they think and do for yourself. Are you wonderfully, joyfully, happy? Bask in that and figure out how you can create more bliss for yourself. Being honest with yourself, about everything, is one of the best things that you can do for you!
Have a wonderful week and lots of love to you!