One of my goals for this year is to get back into the roots of my writing, back to self love. I did a complete overhaul on the Oracle page and now all of the readings are focused on helping you to discover how to truly love yourself.
Each month I’m going to pull a card for us that’s going to give us a focal point for where the work needs to be done this month.
The card for January is the Moonlight Goddess and her domain is repressed emotions, healing, and reflection.
What’s the first feeling, thought, or situation that comes to mind? Ahhh, that’s where your work is this month, if you’re ready for it.
I am a firm believer that we all heal at different speeds. Some of us are gifted with the know-how to deal with things as they happen. Others have to take time to process and at the end of the day we have these emotions, and we have no idea what to do with them or how to deal with them. We stuff it in our pockets, say we’ll take care of it later, and before we know it, later is five years later and it still hurts.
I remember how I felt after my first break-up. I wanted it to be like the movies where you eat a tub of ice cream, sit around in your jammies for a week, and then bam, you are cured of heartache. No one teaches you how to really get over things like that, and even if they did, it’s different for everyone isn’t it?
I felt so frustrated a year later when I’d see Mr. Heartbreak in passing or on social media and I’d get that ache inside of myself.
That wave of sadness and regret and things that I couldn’t even put a name to. Which frustrated me even more because no one wants to be that loser who’s still all heartbroken years later while the rest of the world has moved on. So you stuff it down and you pretend that you’re okay. That you’re ‘normal’, whatever that is.
More years go by and every once and awhile you get those same feelings and they’re followed by shame. Shame that you are still holding onto them and that you still don’t fully understand what you feel or what to do with it. So you stuff it down again thinking maybe one day it’ll disappear on its own.
That affects your life, even when you don’t think that it does. It affects your ability to see yourself in all of the glory that you are. To fully live your life with openness and wild abandon. It starts chipping away at your joy and how you see yourself.
It is safe to acknowledge your feelings. Even when they’re past the expiration date.
Acknowledge that you feel what you feel. You can let your feelings go, surrender them, deal with them, process them, work through them… but at the very least, notice that they are there. Try it out. If you’re repressing your feelings take this month to see if now is the time to work through it.
Talk to a professional. Talk to a friend about grief that still lingers. Write out your feelings about failed relationships. Make art that shows in brush strokes what you can’t find the words to say.
Maybe this is the time to truly work through it. And, you know, maybe it isn’t and that’s okay too. Maybe you aren’t ready, but you won’t know, you won’t progress, if you don’t try. There’s love and healing all around you if you take the step to reach out for it. You have support and you are not alone.
I express all I feel honestly and lovingly, without fear or apprehension.
I am safe – I am loved.